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An apology and plea for help. Blog Options
New Tue, 16th-Apr-2013 11:14 PM
Philosopher Philosopher is offline
 
Views: 21,951
Replies: 27
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Hi Guys,

Im Philosopher. Those in mGG will already know me, being a member of their clan and all. Others may know me from BSG or other tournaments that Ai enter and inevitably fail at. some may know me from my noobish questions in the chatbox. worst of all, some may know me from the ladder...This is mostly directed at those who may have met me on the ladder, but I put this out to the community as a whole.

Im writing this because, as most in mGG and those who hang around the mGG channel on SEA will know Im a rager. I have a big rage and bad manner problem, and as someone in mGG noted 'Philosophy has a lot of anger in him'

I love Starcraft, like many of you it has been one of a few pillars in my life, the others being friends, family and University. Im not very good at Starcraft, I want to be better. I made a pledge with myself at the start of this year, when I was still in bronze that I would attempt to reach Diamond league by the end of the year. At the moment Im currently a high rankedSilver league, Im also able to take games of olds and have come very close to stealing games of Platinums.

Lately, the last couple of days or so, I've been doing very poorly and my rage and anger have started to become a lot more problematic then it was before. I rage, bitch and moan and BM people on the ladder using language Id rather not repeat here. These people aren't bad people, they aren't hurting me in anyway, all they are doing is legitimately beating me with the same strategies and tactics that Im trying to beat them with. These people aren't bad people and they don't deserve any of the crap that I throw at them as their units pour into my base.

This is a plea for help as well as an apology.

I first want to apologize to all the people I've met on the SEA Ladder and to the community as a whole. Ae come to realize that my actions begin to reflect badly on my clan, people Ive come to care about and who help and support me. But my actions also reflect badly on the SEA community. SEA is an awesome community which I want to help expand and grow, but when new players meet me on the ladder, that doesn't reflect well the community that we have. So I would like to sincerely apologize.

I also want to ask for people's help. I don't know really how to control my rage or bad manner.I have tried just walking away from the computer. I have tried exiting the Mae as fast as possible, but every time I start to lose, the filth just pores from my mouth. If anyone has any tips or has any suggestions which may help me overcome my problem that would be really good. I don't want to be a dick anymore, but I hate losing and I don't know how to overcome these problems.

The 2nd ask for help is not really important, mGG helps me a lot, but someone dedicated to helping me improve would be nice. What I really wanted to do was just apologize to everyone, especially my clan, and ask for help.

Hopefully if I can get over this problem I might be able to achieve my goal of Diamond. I would really hate to fail that goal, on top of everything else that is going wrong in my life.

Thanks for taking the time to read this. I hope it wasn't too wordy, or boring.

Regards,

Philosopher.
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Replies to Blog: An apology and plea for help.
New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 7:11 AM BnetId: [fray]FLuX.195  Race: Clan: mGG  Location: Dunedin, New Zealand  Total Posts: 860  # 16
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Re: An apology and plea for help.

Find a style that you enjoy playing, and from there begin to make your own build orders. I used to do this a lot when I was working up to where I am today. Really, from bronze to masters I was running more or less entirely on my own build orders. I had a few short ones that were made by others, generally all ins/cheese (3 hatch ling bane a la Zenio in ZvP). If you're spending your money, keeping out of supply blocks, and constantly producing, AND your build concept, or build order, is solid, you shouldn't have any problems getting into Diamond league.

With all that being said, I'm aware that Zerg is a lot more forgiving when it comes to the use of build orders; so you might want to be a bit more rigid in your usage of them. I used to have a +1 melee zergling all in in ZvZ that I made that basically got me to gold (where I had to relearn ZvZ), simply because that build worked so well vs the various early roach play I saw lots of players using. Learn what works vs what, observe what people around your level generally like to do, then start scouting for indicators; and react in the way that your build order allows you. For instance, if you open robo and scout twilight, you might want to consider going obs before immortal; or if you open stargate you might want to go for an oracle harass instead of phoenix first. Even though protoss isn't necessarily considered a "reactive race" you should still react.

Good manner is important to your enjoyment of the game. I find that when I get angry and frustrated, venting my anger online tends to lead to more problems, and guilt, than it's worth; and it doesn't really make me feel any better about anything. It's much better, instead of raging at your opponent at the end of a game, to simply type "gg", and calmly step away from the computer. Go outside for a breath of fresh air; and consider with a neutral mindset what went wrong for you that game. Then come back, watch the replay (again, neutral and open minded. Come at it, not as a defeated player; but as a curious student learning what went wrong and where); search for the point where your macro goes to shit. Is it before any sort of engagement? If so, then you know what you need to fix, and it's simple to fix. You should be macroing relatively well when you aren't engaging your opponent because that should be your main focus.

Anyway, I'm writing an essay here without really saying as much as needs to be said for good work ethic in StarCraft, but generally you want to look at a problem from all angles instead of just your point of view. Be good mannered, and open to learning new things and improvement will come at a faster rate. Also, play lots of games and keep repeating processes when you lose; find where you lost the game and keep playing with that in mind. Good luck
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New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 7:59 AM   Total Posts: 938  # 17
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Re: An apology and plea for help.

Everyone's right with what they're saying, if it sounds blunt and straight up don't take it badly, some people just have to say it that way.

Anyways, my advice is that you just gotta have fun. Take a loss as a learning experience, use it as a stepping stone to improve. I used to rage pretty bad as well (actually to be honest I still do sometimes) but I just make sure to get my mind off it and just focus on wanting to improve. If I lose too much, I take a breather; have a break (have a kitkat).

Playing something other than SC2 actually does help, gets your mind off the things you're mad about and just have fun playing something different. There's HEAPS of games for that.

Rage = stress and when you stress you can't think properly and also other effects. I know this first hand; I actually have really bad stress levels to the point that I start to twitch and get chest pains, also I tend to always be stiff (as in always have my muscles tensed). It took me going to the doctor to find out it was due to stress. And hey it's a bad thing so I have to do something about it. So yeah, I just try and have fun as much as possible and take losses as a step to getting better. Except I'm just a lazy ass, but that's a different story.

It'd be good if you also are out and about having fun with your friends and such, or do some kind of outdoor activity.

TL;DR: Don't let losses get to you and cause you to stress out. The worst you can do to yourself is make things worse for you outside of the game. Take losses as a stepping stone to improvement and try to have as much fun in and out of game as possible. It won't be easy but I'm sure you're able to do this.

All the best for you man, always here if you need it.
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New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 10:44 AM   Race: Location: Australia  Total Posts: 328  # 18
VorteX
 
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Re: An apology and plea for help.

Here Are some quotes:

Quote:
"Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in doing it." - Greg Anderson
Quote:
"When we are sure that we are on the right road there is no need to plan our journey too far ahead. No need to burden ourselves with doubts and fears as to the obstacles that may bar our progress. We cannot take more than one step at a time." - Orison Swett Maden
Quote:
"Success is a journey, not a destination. The doing is often more important than the outcome." - Arthur Ashe
Quote:
"The road of life twists and turns and no two directions are ever the same. Yet our lessons come from the journey, not the destination." - Don Williams, Jr.
Quote:
"To get through the hardest journey we need take only one step at a time, but we must keep on stepping" - Chinese Proverb
Quote:
"Never stop just because you feel defeated. The journey to the other side is attainable only after great suffering." - Santosh Kalwar
Quote:
Failure is not the end. In fact it is the beginning of a beautiful journey." - Jade Youssef
Quote:
"Goals are my north star. My compass. The map that guides me along the road I wish to travel. Goals are motivations with wind in their sails - they carry me forward despite the storms." - Richelle E. Goodrich
Don't worry too much about getting Diamond by end of this year (it will happen one day)! Don't focus too much on you have to get it! The journey to Diamonds is whats important, not Diamond itself! There will be many obstacles along the way, learn too over come them, step by step.That is what is important! Learning along the way! Having Fun along the way!
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New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 11:00 AM BnetId: Prometheus  Race: Location: Melbourne, Australia  Total Posts: 156  # 19
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Re: An apology and plea for help.

I'd like to add that rage is an absolutely natural emotion. You don't have to feel bad about it. Many great professional players have been ragers at some point in their career, not just in Starcraft but in ANY sport (Roger Federer is a fantastic example).

If you're setting goals for yourself, that's fantastic. But in order the reach those goals, there are times when you will not have fun. This is unavoidable. There is no gain without some pain. But you need to push through it.

Yes, controlling rage will lead to less tilting and more consistency as a player. And it will make it easier to push through when you're feeling discouraged. But you don't owe it to some cheesy shitty random ladder kid to control your rage. Fu ck em. Control your rage because it makes you a better player.
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New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 11:16 AM BnetId: HavOc.1292  Race: Clan: T3C  Location: Gold Coast, Australia  Total Posts: 55  # 20
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Re: An apology and plea for help.

Rage is really difficult to control. I find that even if my opponent has cheesed or all-in'd me, I will just GG and move on to the next game. That way the rage doesn't continue into my next game, affecting my play. You'll learn to control it man - good luck with your journey dude!
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New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 11:30 AM BnetId: aLtShortizz.576  Race: Location: Singapore  Total Posts: 322  # 21
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Re: An apology and plea for help.

Whats wrong with typing ''Ur a f-ing cheesey noob" before exiting a computer game? :O
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New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 11:59 AM BnetId: mGGPressure.946  Race: Location: Sydney  Total Posts: 109  # 22
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Re: An apology and plea for help.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zepph
Your problem may be that you take the game too seriously. I had the same problem (multiple times, in fact) with League of Legends. I figured out that I placed too much emphasis on winning rather than having fun. The fix I found was to just stop playing. As a result I've taken many a few month breaks from the game and when I come back I always enjoy it more because it becomes about having fun rather than making sure my team wins.
Zepph has it pretty spot on. I know I rage when I take the game too seriously, when I hold sc2 too high of an importance in my life. But I dont think you have to stop playing to fix the problem. You just need to realise how unimportant sc2 actually is if you take a step back and take a look.

I know I felt like this years back (back in broodwar) when I was a student and not doing much more than play bw.

I ended up giving myself a whole different mind set by actually adding more thing in my life, like working out often, and work full time, you look at sc2 with less significance than a do or die activity. And it has actually improved me significantly, recently reaching masters, and training more quality than quantity.
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New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 12:22 PM   Race: Clan: Iris  Location: Wellington  Total Posts: 394  # 23
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Re: An apology and plea for help.

why are you apologising here? if youre in silver probably no one you play actually visits this site. its not like you BM'd in a tourny?

Its not possible to apologise to everyone you ever played, and apologising here doesnt really hold any purpose, if you want to make ammends, just manner the **** up on ladder
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New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 12:26 PM BnetId: RuineD.430  Race: Location: Melbourne, Australia  Total Posts: 442  # 24
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Re: An apology and plea for help.

i'm really bad with getting motivated to play sc2, and when i do play it's really easy for me to just quit out of anger or rage. one thing in hots that has helped is playing unranked - the reason i rage is because mistakes cost me the game, points, and a ladder ratio, unranked prevents this and makes the game more about improving and having fun.

once you realise that the game should be taken as if it was a hobby, something to have fun with, rather than a competitive, focus-intensive objective, you'll enjoy it and stop raging.

if you find this difficult and you're still bming other people, one thing i do is just take the anger out on myself - don't blame balance, don't blame the tactics of other people - try to find what you did wrong and blame your own mistakes instead of the actions of other people and things out of your control.
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New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 5:04 PM BnetId: Zeratul.523  Race: Clan: mGG  Location: Seoul, Korea  Total Posts: 236  # 25
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Re: An apology and plea for help.

You shouldn't have the time for emotions when you're following your build order and macroing I can't even imagine getting mad at sc2 there is too much to do ingame. No time for being mad.
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New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 5:09 PM   Race: Location: Brisbane Australia  Total Posts: 677  # 26
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Re: An apology and plea for help.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mGGZeratul
You shouldn't have the time for emotions when you're following your build order and macroing I can't even imagine getting mad at sc2 there is too much to do ingame. No time for being mad.
Ain't nobody got time fo' dat!

That being said, that's a pretty good mindset
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New Wed, 17th-Apr-2013, 5:34 PM BnetId: ToxicTiger.417  Race: Location: West Australia  Total Posts: 47  # 27
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Smiley: Smile Re: An apology and plea for help.

Quote:
Originally Posted by FlashVeno
My advice would just to play to improve. Don't focus on your w/l or your points, but just try to improve from each game. When you lose, just think of how you would have played better to win that game the next time. Losing is ok , just learn from your mistakes.
This this all the way
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