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crAzerk · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 2:26 AM

RULES:
1) Every reply to this thread must contain a joke of some sort - whether its a story joke, wordplay, riddle, etc. If you don't have a joke but really want to comment on sth, use Rep!
2) Try to keep it clean (avoid race/explicit/personal jokes)
3) Have fun!
4) if you have alot of things to say other than your joke, bold your joke so people can find it easily.
5) Keep it to one joke per post, so this thread lasts forever

To kick things off:

Did you hear about the movie called Constipation?

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.
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It's not out yet.

Quick Comments

Highlander:

Ahh... I thought this thread was about Gus. Different joke obviously...

MooZfY · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 2:31 AM

Why did the Colossus fall over?

Because it was imbalanced

Quick Comments

	cRSenSei:	no mate... build vikings
	Nemo:	Known but good joke :)

Aean(: · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 6:02 AM

why did uncletoby fall off the swing
he had no arms

why did uncletoby drop his icecream
a hover car hit him

Quick Comments

neon:

how was he holding his ice cream with no arms...

FaDePressureTest · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 9:58 AM

What kind of bees make milk?

Boobees!

**Maynarde** · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 10:39 AM

Constipation jokes? I got ya covered.

What did the constipated mathematician do? - He worked it out with a pencil.

Why do constipated people do whatever they want? - They don't give a crap.

A man was constipated, so he decided to go to the doctor.
The doctor examined him and explained, "I'm going to give you some suppositories. I'll insert one now, and then I'll give you another one for later this evening."
Later that evening, the man asks has his wife to insert the suppository.
She agrees reluctantly, then puts one hand on his shoulder and inserts the suppository.
Suddenly, her husband freaks out "Aahhhhh!"
"What's wrong? Did I hurt you?" she asks.

"No... I just realised that the doctor had both his hands on my shoulders!"

Quick Comments

	FaDeBadger:
	TAkrunch:	ahahahahahaha
	Cyanide:	lol @ punchline

FaDeBadger · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 10:45 AM

Q: What is the most erotic number?
A: 2110593!
Q: Why?
A: When 2 are 1 and don't pay a10tion, they'll know within 5 weeks whether or not, after 9 months, they'll be 3...

crAzerk · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 10:50 AM

Lol Maynarde, heard the long one before

Why was the scarecrow promoted?

Because he was outstanding in the field!

Quick Comments

TAScarecrow:

true story

dragonnaus · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 11:09 AM

Trololollolo

Quick Comments

	Cyanide:	read the rules, fool
	Maynarde:	^
	TADivinity:	^^^

**nirvAnA** · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 11:12 AM

Q: Why is glade my bitch?

Cause hes busy cleaning my car

Cause hes busy cleaning my room

Cause hes busy 3in1ing my toliet bowl

Quick Comments

	FaDeBadger:	Love it
	TABjornbrandr:
	freaky_beeky:
	Nemo:	Nirvana so BM ! lol

crAzerk · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 1:37 PM

LOLOL I took like 10 seconds to get LosDog's one

Anyway, to bold text, just use [b]bold[/b] which will turn out as bold

What do they say in a vegetable church?

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Lettuce pray.

dragonnaus · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 2:17 PM

Bring back my good jokes

Satu · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 2:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TAJPMoney

This thread.

There is no escape.

dippa · Thu, 10th-Nov-2011, 2:18 PM

Why did the bird fall out of the tree?

Because it was dead.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

The Holocaust.

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream?

Because he got hit by a bus.

How do you confuse a blond?

Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

Your momma's so fat that she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas?

Cancer.

Quick Comments