SC2SEA.com - Starcraft 2 SEA eSports Community Site

Hi guys! I just felt like blogging about my last few weeks that were filled with both disappointments and a lot of fun.

Ever since Season 5, I've been struggling to get into Grandmaster league. Almost ever season until S5 I've been stuck on the top of Masters League and I felt demotivated to watch many other old teammates from nRv and friends from sR getting into Grandmaster in much shorter time than me. In the beginning, when I finally reached a high mmr that would land me that GM spot, I always started tilting. I didn't believe in myself and my play. I analysed my replays and just felt like I wasn't good enough to compete at the level and I was at a point where I decided to quit the game because I felt like there was no way I could continue to improve.

At the same time, I had to deal with end of year exams and I struggled to maintain a balanced life between SC2 and Studies. I maintained a horrible sleeping schedule and generally stopped giving a shit about school. Although I did better than I expected on some tests I was disappointed with my results and my mother really put me through a hard time because of her harsh expectations (Asian).

However, after a 2-3 day break (after my exams) I came back with a renewed motivation after watching my favorite Protoss players play in the GSL. Many recent SC2SEA tournaments and LANS in Australia helped to inspire me. However, the games from MC, NaNiwa and Squirtle seemed like games that I could mimic and use with the correct control and approach to the game. I started practicing a lot with my teamates in sR and friends like Shieldz and I focused a lot more on how I mentally approached the game and I started getting back into a solid winstreak.

Finally, around 2 weeks ago I hit GM. Achieving really felt like a great burden on my back had been dealt with but I was still disappointed in my play in Clan Wars and I felt embarassed to play so poorly under the sR tag. I also performed poorly in many SC2SEA events and I had hit that slump again. Turning to the NA and KR server for help, I continued to fail to impress and I took another break.

Coming back to find the motivation to continue to improve in SC2 was hard, but I really have to thank the people at sR for helping me. DreaM really helped me through a tough time and with the added pressure of managing sR taken off me I was able to resume playing SC2 full-time with the holidays. Thank you so much to DreaM who helped take the pressure off me managing sR and it's website and I hope with my added practice I will finally be able to show results in future tournaments, clan wars and perhaps find a team.

I'm sorry if this blog sounds like a bunch of paragraphs but TLDR: I've been going through a tough time and I'd like to thank my teammates and all the players that inspired me to play better!