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How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

Currently listening to: Garbage, Johnny Hobo and the Freight Trains, Fireworks
Currently playing: Final Fantasy XIV (god knows why), LoL, SCII, My yearly replay of A Link to the Past
Currently reading: Crime and Punishment - Dostoyevsky

Edit: Where's the next part of that chatbox slashfic blog?

A short story:


I didn't really want to go out on Thursday night. I had a report due the next morning, and (as usual) I was tired and strapped for cash. But it was a friends birthday and I didnt' really want to be a dick. So a mate came around and we hung out at mine for a bit.

The predrinks of choice for the night consisted of a bottle of Black Douglas and a quarter sack of goon. A perfectly reasonable amount for the two of us. Kevin Devine, Perfume, Childish Gambino and Fenix TX set the mood for the evening, as often is the case. After a few drinks the conversation steered towards the best types of instant noodles and girls we knew that we wanted to hatefuck.

At about 11 or so, it was time to head into the city. We got to the shitty club sometime around 11.30, hunted down my friends and wished one a happy birthday. We danced, we drank and we were merry. Oddly enough, we all found ourselves having far more luck with the ladies than we really should have, considering our state by this point. Every Sunday I remind myself that if they're willing to be with me when I'm in that state, I don't want to be with them. I always forget this T.T

The girl I was kinda after was friends with a pretty good friend of mine, but she still won't get with me after an incident at a party at her place like two years ago. Ah well. I ended up macking on with this kinda short girl (shawty yo) who ended up getting thrown out for fighting, like fist fighting, with some dude shortly after. The next girl traded me a kiss for a cigarette (always worth it).

Five o'clock rolls around, and things are looking dire. Prospects of finding a girl to go home with weren't crash hot. Standards were lowered. But I'd come all this way against my will, so **** it, I was going to make it worth my time. I approached a fat (well not fat, but like large - okay, fat) chick. She said I looked like I could be a part of One Direction. I'm not exactly sure what that meant, but she was digging it. She insisted that I went back to hers, which was half an hour away, instead of mine which was like ten minutes. Whatever.


Upon arrival she asked if I had condoms. No, I'd left them at my place. The pill was a no go, so she told me to go to 7/11. By myself. In a suburb I've never been to before in my life. In the freezing cold.

Naturally I went. When I got back, she was asleep. I kicked her a bit til she woke up, then we proceeded to have the worst sex of my life. I was tired, drunk and thinking of my report due in four hours, so yes, I didn't perform. I still told her that it was her fault, then it was time for me to make my exit.

I ventured to the 7/11 from before and there was a cab there. Things were finally looking up. The driver said he'd take me home, he just needed to drop off his current customers around the corner, then he'd come back for me. Awesome. His customers, three ladies of indigenous Australian descent, told me not to be stupid, and just get in the taxi with them, to save time. I obliged (it was cold as shit)

They insisted that I sit in the middle. Sure, sounds reasonable. On the way to their stop one started hugging me and stuff. Perfectly understandable, I often have that effect on women. We arrived at their stop. When we got there, they ran off without paying. I kinda felt bad for the taxi driver, but it was pretty funny. Until I realized that the one that was hugging me took my phone. ******* bitch.

I spent the next hour or so in a police station, making my statement. They said as there was no real evidence, it was unlikely that I would get my phone back. I guessed that, but thought it was worth a shot, as I still have a year left on the plan.

It was now 7.30, and I really needed to finish up this assignement, so I forked out another fifty dollars in taxi fares, got home, shat out a report in an hour and a bit, handed it in like a boss, and ended up getting to bed sometime a bit after lunch.

After sleeping for a day or so, I now find myself bored on a Saturday night, broke as shit and without a phone. But it was a pretty good time (almost as fun as the night we ran into the cutest hooker ever). Time to play some videogames. Life's good.



*Honestly, it's as good as, if not better than Diddy's Kong Quest

Why my Youtube links not embedding?

Please recommend me some new music. Looking for ambient/electro kinda stuff at the moment. Something chilled out.

Started on another get rich quick scheme. Will let you all know if I become a millionaire.

To anyone in the beta, what's Guild Wars 2 like?


Sorry to jtx, I'll get around to writing my blog on tsunderes soon. Promise.

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

You guys lives keep amazing me. That sort of things feel so far now that I have a ordered family life. I can't say I miss it though.

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

Had a great read at work. I might share one of my tales as well, with graphic detail ofcourse.

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

I look forward to it. I originally wrote out all the details (it was probably just as long as the rest haha) but decided against it.

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

i thought you were a girl ???

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

awesome read. bl about the phone .

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

omg those girls are enterprising T_T phone!!!!!!!!

really enjoyed this blog!!!!

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

Cute, you are such a boss.

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

awesome read

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

I wish you would blog more, love your writing

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

Your life seems exciting. WRITE MORE.

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

Holy shit your descriptions are amazing, so stink about the phone though

I wish to party with you now.

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

I will if you do!

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

You seem like my kinda guy rofl

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

I'm retired.. you still have a blooming career ahead of you.

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

Man your life is waaay better than what I have ahahah too bad about your phone though.
Those chicks that robbed you might get something similar to happen to them though
karma's has a funny way of doing things too bad we can't see it happen sometimes.

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

It's the rock and roll life style of an unemployed videogame addict yo

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

Definate Points for Childish Gambino!

EDIT : And Cake. Marry me?

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

hahahaha it was just as entertaining the second time i read it. I WANT MORE...

...but next time you need blackjack, and hookers

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

I would, but I can't help but fear that we'd eventually grow apart, due to your not giving a shit

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

This was fantastic. Thanks for sharing!

Re: How I got robbed and some other stuff
 

Hope you realise that phones can be traced via IMEI numbers. Once the phone has been turned on twice in the same location police are able to get a warrant to search the address for it.
If you don't know the IMEI, if you bought it from a phone store you can get it from there (phone stores record IMEIs when selling phones).