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The unkindness of Life
 

If anyone has seen my stream over the past few days, you would have noticed I haven't been using a webcam, it's mainly to hide my face, I am in a really bad situation financially and not really dealing with it too well, it has put a massive burden on myself and my family.

I apply for 10-15 jobs a day and have been out of work for close to 2 months, I have sold my old car (my first car) to cover as many bills as possible, have sold many other items just to keep myself on top with everything that's going on, however it's now starting to pile up, my budget has gotten even tighter.

My expenses that I pay out leave me with about $15 a fortnight for food. No I don't want sympathy nor do I write this asking for money, that has never been in my nature, I am upset with myself for being so careless over the past 2 years and not saving as much money as I can, instead I spend a lot of money on better gear for gaming, spend money on coaching for a game I will never get good at, I buy online merchandise for in game benefits, I have been careless.

I am writing this to say, I am deeply sorry to those that I have acted out against, those I have belittled, those that I have started arguments with for no real reason. I am sorry to those that have put faith in me, for me to simply act the same immature way again. I am 24 years old and have nothing to show for it, I honestly think I need to take a break from various games and gaming related content, I am unsure of how this will go for me as gaming as been in my life and kept me here for a good 8 years.

To those that have helped me along the way I thank you. I wish everyone all the best, if I come back here, I will try to be a better person, a more responsible adult.

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

I'm sort of on the same boat (unemployment).

I don't exactly condone it but I don't think there is another option right now. Have you tried to apply for Newstart from Centrelink? That stuff has been helping me plenty to stay afloat while looking for work. Then again I don't exactly have that many expenses so I basically save a lot.. However if you aren't on it, I recommend you do.

Also try to sort out your finances and try to cut out what is pretty unnecessary right now since you're on a tight budget.

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

listen to your family and make good decisions which will benefit you in the long run.

best of luck.

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

Good luck man. I've been in that space where the decision between paying bills or eating were a very real thing, so I hope things work out over time.

Take care of yourself

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

Best of luck man. Hope you get everything sorted!

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

Sorry to see you go Chid, hopefully things turn around and you can make it back here.

Best of luck

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

Sorry to hear you're going through a rough time lately.

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

Biggest thing you need to do in future once you get a job is to get SAVINGS. Not waste money into coaching for multiple games you play.

Savings will do well for you man.

Hope you get the stuff sorted out and get on feet again.
You were a good student~

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

Oh man, I have been feeling a similar way recently, although my financial situation isn't as bad as yours.
I've been playing this game for 5 years and it's been a huge time sink (even though I am basically a casual) and I have nothing to show for it aside from being an above average diamond player.
Makes me want to uninstall. Kinda wish I had used all those hours studying harder or bettering myself or finding jobs or something.
I'm 24 too haha.
tl:dr mid-twenties life crisis.

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

@seffy, yeah currently on newstart allowance.
- my expenses: rent, elec, phone, internet, car repayments. after this im left with $15 a fortnight, which needs to go towards fuel/food

@azz, yeah my parents are helping me where they can, especially food wise and allowing me to borrow their car for job interviews etc, which im very fortunate for

@cres, i appreciate the support, i talked to satu about the whole food thing recently and listed my shopping for the fortnight to him.

@metalcore, thanks bud

@swarmstika, yeah man i think atm, im occasionally popping in to keep myself up to date with things, not posting too much as it will mainly be emotional dribble, kinda fragile with my thoughts atm, so trying not to get involved with drama

@eddie, yeah a lot of people have hard times, mine atm is more so emotional then anything

@mushi, yeah, i already have goals in place etc, i had $2k in savings prior to losing my job, but unfortunately hada few car troubles that made me use a lot of that up, which was kinda of a bad run of luck for me, in future though, i wont be getting any coaching from anyone, i dont see myself trying to join teams get to top leagues in any games anymore, i dont think its within my own ability to do so. with that said, i still have 4 hours of coaching with pig remaining that i purchased awhile back, so i might chat to him, see if i can perhaps give away those 4 hours.

@goosejuice, with me saying i have nothing to show for it, i meant like material possessions, things that will benefit me in life, eg qualifications different licenses that kind of stuff, in terms of a game sense, it makes me sad i actually put in effort since Hots release for a about 18 months and couldnt get past gold

Overall, I want to thank people for their support, if anyone wants to chat etc, feel free to add me on skype.
FUIC-Birchy

I'll also be popping in and out of here so feel free to message me.

In my original post i said "if I come back here, I will try to be a better person, a more responsible adult." by this I mean mentally, so writing blogs, being involved with discussions, chatbox and being mature towards those i converse with.

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

Why not start doing a tafe degree or something to get you some qualifications making it easier to find a job?

Centerlink will pay you (more if they already are) to study.

Just get your priorities straight, get some valuable skills and work hard towards finding a job.

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

Yeah mezje, I just completed a cert 3 on logistics, i got told upon completion I will be offered 2 jobs. (from the company who signed me up for the course)

So hopefully if that pans out it should make things a little bit easier, thanks for your positive input

Re: The unkindness of Life
 

Nice man, good luck! Remember to always do a cover letter when filling out online apps.

If you have never wrote one there is heaps of good resources online and I mean HEAPS.