Recently in sc2sea community news two unknown irrelevant diamond players decided that they weren't getting enough attention in real life and decided that they would become relevant on the Internet. Cries of 'Notice me senpai' have been reported to have been coming from fullmetal's house recently causing concern for his friends and family.
fullmetal called out Swarmstika for 'seeming to hate me for some reason' in a thread completely unrelated to himself because this was a great opportunity to grab some attention.
In response swarmstika replied "I didn't realise I even hated you" TALK ABOUT A PLOT TWIST.
The plot thickened as fullmetal decided that he'd had enough of Swarmstika's hidden but apparently constant harassment of him and decided to challenge him to a showmatch!
The showmatch drew in a massive crowd of mostly just each other and the person observing but wow was it intense. Never in my life have I seen such brilliant diamond league action
both players should be in gsl (but blizzard won't promote them).
With slurs like 'foolmetal' and 'Swarmshita' both poets went into battle to see who was the least most irrelevant player to ever have competed in a showmatch.
Even the notorious Soundwave, master of high diamond/low masters joined in on the thread because it was the one time that the players in the showmatch were worse than him. Calling them out for being slightly below his mmr.
Soul, sc2sea's resident 'should be gm if the leagues weren't broken' player, also commented with his clever word player such as 'Fullretard' and 'SwarmSHATON'. Utterly hilarious and I found myself literally Loling.
My match report may be a little off because I wasn't able to catch the game because I was.. err.. busy and not because the games were probably very bad.
As the match started, both players cleared their minds of the shots fired before the event and immersed themselves in the game of starcraft only to realise they are diamond players and don't know what they are doing. Boasting a massive 100+ apm swarmstika was about to clitch the first game in what was an amazing
display of what a diamond player is capable of.
Game 2 was played on some map from this season, one player spawning in one position and the other spawning on another legal position based on the map. Swarmstika opened standard zerg making some queens and drones and fullmetal opened
with units of his own. it was amazing from what I've heard, both players spending their money at a moderately ok rate only floating 1000 minerals AFTER they reached 3 bases and were required to do other things. Swarmstika managed to win
because according to fullmetal "zerg is complete bullshit".
The match heated up as Swarmstika entered his match point game. I'm getting tired of writing this so I'll just tell you that Swarmstika won, he probably made zerglings and banelings maybe even some mutas. Swarmstika emerged victorious claiming his 30 osc points that he will use to probably make the osc finals because there aren't 32 players in the sea region.
As a summary, big congrats to Swarmstika who has proven that I still don't know who he is and will continue to but at least I know he is better then fullmetal and that's what really matters. Because in the end we are all terrible at this
game, these guys are just a lot more terrible than me and thus I am able to make fun of them without feeling bad. I'm also pretty well known on this site so I could call them both ***** and the circlejerk would probably still be
on my side.
I wish you had submitted the minimum 2 articles to get the one of the 'pay 2 rite' jobs on sc2sea. You would have gotten Hunghimself-burgers job fow shaw!!
Top stuff Wally, keep it up! 9/10.
(10/10 would require better formatting, and some shit colours like the other 'pay 2 rite' people used.
Soul, sc2sea's resident 'should be gm if the leagues weren't broken' player, also commented with his clever word player such as 'Fullretard' and 'SwarmSHATON'. Utterly hilarious and I found myself literally Loling.
Sometimes I just don't know how I'm so brilliant man.
8/8 battle report, i'm keen to see another writeup! quality stuff!
Good luck. Looks like a great opportunity for everyone involved
___________________________________ "Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you." - Tyrion Lannister
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